In memoriam: Kobe Bryant— my thoughts

These past couple of days have been a whirlwind of sorts. The unexpected deaths of Kobe Bryant, his 13 year old daughter Gianna, some friends, and a helicopter pilot have been emotionally paralyzing. I have read so many tributes and Instagram posts, touching and emotional words from those who knew Kobe or admired him. It made me feel like somehow I knew him too. I think actor James Van Der Beek had a great perspective on it when he said, “when tragedy befalls a legend... it effects us. And we post about it. Not just because of their achievements, great though they may have been, or because they were more important than the millions who also may have suffered that day, but because our shared grief makes us human”. We empathize with one another, and for those moments when we’re thinking about that person, we all have something in common. We have a shared love, a shared appreciation, a shared respect.

I will admit, early in Kobe’s basketball career, I struggled with what I thought of him. To me, with fame comes great responsibility. Being a basketball player, so many young people idolized Kobe, and  I wondered if he was a good example for them. I was hard on him, unrelenting at times. He had that sexual assault charge in 2003, one that was later dropped. He admits it almost destroyed his marriage to Vanessa. The truth is, I don’t know what happened, none of us do. I’d like to think that he grew from whatever happened. I’d like to think that God and the universe was trying to tell him something when he blessed Kobe with four beautiful daughters. On the flip side, I’d like to think that those who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. We have all made mistakes. We have all done things we would rather forget. We are all inherently flawed. I’ve always made a point of saying that as hard as I am on others, I’m even harder on myself, probably tenfold.

I’ll tell you my true feelings about Kobe Bryant. For the time he played for the Lakers, he made me a fan. Growing up in Boston, perhaps the greatest sports city in the country, I have obviously always been a Celtics fan first, but Kobe, Kobe made me respect and appreciate one of our greatest rivals. Oh I routed for the Lakers many times. There was something special about Kobe as a basketball player and as a person. You could tell by the way he played ball that he had unrelenting drive. There was this fire in him, it made him the best of competitors. And these qualities translated to his life. It was clear.

What else is true about Kobe? As great as he was, his talent limitless it seemed; he was humble. He never forgot where he started or where he came from. He was genuine and generous with his time. So many have talked about how he made them feel special in the moments that they spent together. He did not have “passing moments” with people, but rather, he spent time getting to know them and chatting with them. Kobe loved his family. What comes across through photograph after photograph is the love he had for them. The reason he traveled so much via helicopter was to be able to get more time with his family.

Perhaps though what was most inspiring and most relatable about Kobe is that he was human, and he fully admitted it. A couple years ago Kobe released the documentary “Dear Basketball”. The running time was five minutes and it won an Oscar for Best Animated Short Film, it was the first Oscar for an athlete. Fitting that it was Kobe. Was there anything he couldn’t do? We need not go through stats, But we will, 5 time NBA champion, 2 time finals MVP, 1 time league MVP, 2 time Olympic gold medalist, so many All Star selections I can’t count, it was over 15; the man scored 60 points in his last game. “Dear Basketball” is Kobe’s story, his goodbye letter to basketball, and it’s beautiful.




Hearing the news yesterday, I couldn’t believe it. I thought someone was playing a cruel trick. After seeing it on my Instagram feed, I had to turn on the news just to be sure. Immediately after finding out it was true, I cried. I cried because someone who was young and had so much to live for, so much life left, lost their life needlessly. I prayed so hard that it wasn’t true, that it was just a terrible dream. I prayed that no one else perished. When unconfirmed reports came through that children were on board, I prayed to God, please no! When all was said and done, nine people lost their lives yesterday, including three children. Dozens of families were changed forever in a matter of moments yesterday, countless friends and fans. I think Jennifer Lopez put it best when she said, “we are all feeling sadness from this loss, but all I can think of is that it is a grain of sand compared to what Vanessa must be going through right now”.

Kobe was human. Despite the fact that he was a talented, disciplined athlete who had a work ethic like no other, he had a lot of self doubt. If someone like Kobe could have self doubt, then it’s possible for me, and that I can still potentially achieve greatness and that it’s up to me—- it makes me believe anything is possible. He talked a lot about the “Mamba mentality”, how it made him push forward at his weakest moments and access the champion within himself. He inspired countless people. He inspired me. His sense of humanity is his legacy, his will not be forgotten.

“I have self doubt. I have insecurity. I have fear of failure. I have nights when I show up at the arena and I’m like, ‘my back hurts, my feet hurt, my knees hurt. I don’t have it. I just want to chill.’ We all have self doubt. You don’t deny it, but you also don’t capitulate it. You embrace it”. — Kobe Bryant

“Those times when you get up early, and you work hard; those times when you stay up late and you work hard; those times when you don’t feel like working— you’re too tired, you don’t want to push yourself, but you do it anyway. That is actually the dream. That’s the dream. It’s not the destination, it’s the journey. And if you guys can understand that, what you’ll see happen is that you won’t accomplish your dreams, your dreams won’t come true, something greater will”. — Kobe to his daughters the night he retired from the NBA

I would ask you to please click this link and see how the Grammys paid tribute to Kobe: https://www.essence.com/awards-events/red-carpet/grammys/alicia-keys-boyz-ii-men-grammys-kobe-bryant/

Leave your thoughts and love below. Life is too short, tell your loved ones you love them. Hold them close, don’t take life for granted.

Best Dressed at the 2020 SAG Awards: All My Picks

I don't really watch the SAG Awards but I do love watching the Red Carpet. This year was no exception. This was tougher than the Golden Globes in terms of picking best dressed because the ladies stepped it up.

Jane Seymour, at 68, looked like she has been sipping from the fountain of youth. She was absolutely dazzling in a silver sequin gown that hugged her curves beautifully. Seymour credits being in shape with intermittent fasting and giving up alcohol. Her dress, designed by SHO, was simple and complimented her perfectly.

Jen Aniston wore black to the Golden Globes and white to the SAG Awards where she won for her new series The Morning Show. Her vintage style gown was Christian Dior circa 1999. The gown was simple yet she was stunning. 

Cynthia Erivo has quickly turned into a red carpet darling. She does no wrong in terms of her style 

choices. The London actress was nominated for her performance in Harriett and wore a bright color blocked gown by Schiaparelli. The dress is so gorgeous and clearly the centerpiece so she only needed simple jewelry which she did perfectly. 

Jennifer Lopez is a red carpet fave of mine personally. She is always stunning, and the SAG Awards were no exception. J. Lo was a vision in a black Valentino gown that was anything but basic. It had a bow in the back, similar detail to her Golden Globes gown, but I loved it more because this was more feminine and delicate to me. This was quite honestly my favorite look of the night. 

My favorite thing that I read about Charlize Theron's look was-- look at Charlize, look at Charlize's abs (insert heart eyes emojis). She said she didn't have time to touch up her roots so she wore Tiffany diamonds in her hair. Her two piece outfit was Givenchy Haute Couture-- the silver crop top and black maxi skirt were such a daring choice. 

Oh wow, Scarlett Johansson is absolutely angelic in Armani Prive. Her custom gown featured teal blue silk with a plunging neckline and that red lip was the perfect touch. She looked extra lovely on the arm of her fiance. 

A best dressed list is never complete without Nicole Kidman. She always manages to look like the most beautiful princess in all the land. Nicole wore a sapphire blue Michael Kors gown with matching earrings. Her signature locks completed the look by giving it a vintage vibe. 

Who were your favorites? Leave me some comments below. 

Best Dressed at the Golden Globes 2020

Other than Ricky Gervais's monologue the best thing about the Golden Globes was the fashion. Though, it wasn't as tough this year to pick the best dressed-- these ladies stood out!

Nicole Kidman was stunning in a red Versace gown accompanied by date and hubby Keith Urban. White and gold tassel earrings and a gold bag completed her goddess look. #couplegoals

Renee Zellweger made her comeback to the red carpet in perhaps one of the most understated looks of the night. She was elegant in a strapless baby blue Armani Prive gown with matching Jimmy Choo's. Her night was made complete with a win for "Judy". 

Jen Aniston's amazing genes were on display in a simple and sophisticated black Dior Haute Couture gown. The ruffles at the top and the bow at her waist gave the gown a feminine twist while a gold necklace added elegance. 50 looks pretty good. 

 I am a sucker for Prianka Chopra Jonas in this unique fuschia Cristina Ottaviano gown. I love the off the shoulder look on her, her loose curls, and statement necklace made such a bold statement. She was honestly perfect from head to toe. 

Last but not least, and quite possibly my pick for the night-- Sofia Vergara in Dolce & Gabanna. Her whole look was so flawless and well put together. The wine color was so stunning on her; I loved the Lorraine Schwartz jewel details in her dress. The gown was the perfect fit for her figure and a matching purse and earrings completed this look. 

**I will be back with my best dressed picks for the Academy Awards.** 

The Year in Music: 2019 in Review

It's the list that I think about all year. Sometimes I hear a song and I think to myself--- this needs to make my list at year's end.

There were so many who had an amazing 2019. The Weeknd reinvented himself in a way and released three songs that were BIG but are poised to be huge in 2020.

Ed Sheeran released a collaboration album with many memorable artist--Travis Scott, Chris Stapleton, Bruno Mars, Justin Bieber, Cardi B, Camilla Cabello, and Khalid among them. He had to make the list for doing something so ambitious. He then announced at the close of the year that he would be taking a break. Let's hope he doesn't stay away for too long.

I loved the influence of Latin artists on the charts-- Daddy Yankee and J. Balvin spiced things up!

Post Malone showed through hit after hit in 2019 that he will not be a one hit wonder.

Lewis Capaldi had a breakout year and proved he is going to be a star-- he's opening for Niall Horan who will be on tour this year.

Drake and Chris Brown called a truce with the release of No Guidance.

The Jonas Brothers reunited and were better than ever.

Billy Ray Cyrus teamed up with Little Nas X for a song that landed at number one longer than any other song in 2019!

Dan and Shay, like Lewis Capaldi,  also had a breakout year that became massive when Justin Bieber collaborated on a song called 10,000 Hours.

There were lots of strong women who made last year amazing in music--- Lizzo, Bebe Rexha, Dua Lipa, Ciara, and Camilla Cabello who taught us that love is empowering.'

I don't want to wait any longer, here's the list-----



Beautiful People-- Ed Sheeran and Khalid
Blinding Lights-- The Weeknd
Call You Mine-- Bebe Rexha and The Chainsmokers
Circles-- Post Malone




Con Calma-- Daddy Yankee
Dancing with a Stranger-- Normani and Sam Smith
Don't Start Now-- Dua Lipa



Easier-- Five Seconds of Summer
Find You Again-- Mark Ronson featuring Camilla Cabello
The Git Up-- Blanco Brown
God's Country-- Blake Shelton
Good as Hell-- Lizzo



Heartless-- The Weeknd



Highest in the Room-- Travis Scott
High Love-- Kygo and Whitney Houston
Juice-- Lizzo
Living Proof-- Camilla Cabello



Lost in the Fire-- The Weeknd
Memories-- Maroon 5
Nice to Meet Ya-- Niall Horan
No Guidance-- Drake and Chris Brown

Old Town Road-- Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus

On Chill-- Wale and Jeremih



Only Human-- The Jonas Brothers
Ritmo-- Black Eyed Peas and J Balvin
Senorita-- Shawn Mendes and Camilla Cabello
Someone You Loved-- Lewis Capaldi
Speechless-- Dan and Shay
Tequila-- Dan and Shay



Thinkin' 'Bout You-- Ciara



Did I miss something? What made your list? Drop some comments below----